Accurate emotional vocabulary to write your memoir

Did you know that there are 87 human emotions, according to Brené Brown? Most people identify three. As writers we must distinguish between them, articulate them, and use them in our writing by showing feelings and attitudes, instead of describing them. We need accurate emotional vocabulary.

HOW DO I SHOW OR SUGGEST AN EMOTION?

Imagine walking from the gym into a swish of sweet summer rain. Observe your bodily sensations, using all your senses. Close your eyes and become aware of the feelings stirring up inside you. Now write that, without saying “I feel joy”. You will suggest and show, instead of telling your readers about your emotion. This makes your writing powerful, evocative, and almost poetic.

OBSERVATION TO BUILD AN EMOTIONAL DICTIONARY

Look around you for inspiration. Closely observe how you and others experience and exhibit emotions. Look with a cool and objective eye, to gather insight and capture the key expressions of particular emotions.

What goes on in your body and mind and in your environment? What behaviours and words are associated with the emotion? If you work with other people, this technique is particularly useful. Take a breath, observe, and note down what happened later. Emotions are internal and external bodily sensations; James Borg tells us.

EMOTIONS ARE THE DRIVING FORCE BEHIND HUMAN ACTIONS

Being able to accurately pinpoint and convey emotion is crucial as they are the driving force behind human actions, decisions, and experiences. You need conflict to drive the storyline of your life story. “Emotions help to create tension and conflict in a story, as characters are forced to grapple with their feelings and make difficult decisions.”

ACCURATE EMOTIONAL VOCABULARY TO EXPRESS OURSELVES

We need accurate language to express what we want to say, and we need the language of emotions to do so. Self-awareness puts us in the productive state where we can creatively explore our own emotional vocabulary and meaning in our stories.

WHY DO WE NEED TO UNDERSTAND EMOTION WHEN WE WRITE?

Brené Brown offers the following advice which is directly applicable to writing your life story: “Language is our portal to meaning-making, connection, healing, learning, and self-awareness. Having access to the right words can open entire universes. When we don’t have the language to talk about what we’re experiencing, our ability to make sense of what’s happening and share it with others is severely limited. Language shows us that naming an experience doesn’t give the experience more power, it gives us the power of understanding and meaning.”

KNOW THE DIFFERENCE

In her book Atlas of the Heart, Brown describes the 87 emotions we feel and how they can be distinguished.

“Guilt, for example, tells people they did something bad while shame tells people they are something bad. The difference between envy and jealousy is that envy materializes when one wants something somebody else has—looks, status and wealth are the big trio—while jealousy is the feeling that a relationship is being threatened.”

EXCAVATE THE UNSAID IN YOUR LIFE STORY

 When you are writing your life story, you are honouring the sacred nature of a story: your story. You want to write it so well that others will treat it with respect and care. Remember that, as an author coach, I am here to assist you with your journey.

The last word to you, as a writer, comes from Brown: “I am here for my purpose. I’m not here to make people comfortable or to be liked. My purpose is to know and experience love. This means excavating the unsaid. In the world and in me.”